"This is really a noble pursuit. We shouldn't be ashamed of
asking our customers to help us fund the brilliant stuff we do
for them..."
- STEVE BOWBRICK of Another.com, whose "noble" calling enables
punters to pay UKP15 to have an email address ending in
@sexteacher.co.uk, @sexychristmas.co.uk, @shaggin-wagon.com,
@shagmebaby.co.uk, @sheepshagger.co.uk, and many, many more...
http://www.guardian.co.uk/online/story/0,3605,653291,00.html
>> HARD NEWS <<
unlicensed venues
No lunch, but plenty of Guinness: the perfect recipe for
Bram Cohen's CODECON 2002 at the DNA Lounge last weekend.
Jamie Zawinski was the host, paid it seems in constant robust
on-stage Mozilla-dissings. But jwz chose to hold court only
in the shadowy infra-conference taking place on IRC between
802.11b-wielding audience members. Onstage activity was left
to a) handsome shoe-gazing hackers describing potentially
copyright-infringing ecosystems written while on the dole,
b) older attorneys grimfacedly pleading with them to never
openly mention any illicit activities, and c) grinning
ancient heroes irresponsibly gloating over past criminal
capers. In the first camp, Dan "effugas" Kaminsky's "batshit
things I've done with ssh to beat NAT" talk and Jonathan
Moore's self-organising, self-routing, self-aware port of
military-industrial Wifi tech MobileMesh scored the highest
cred points. In the second category, Fred von Lohrmann's
repeated attempts to prevent Peer To Peer To Prison
scenarios - including an overly cheery suggestion to have
your back-of-an-envelope network diagrams edited by legal
counsel - were soberly heeded. (He made some very good
points on avoiding live updates and freeloader-punishing,
too: lest the court make you update a network-killer, or
force you to punish *all* your users equally). Finally, in
the unrepentant good old boys' camp: one day you'll be as
old as Phil Zimmermann, who finally announced that he *did*
upload the PGP source to a world-readable location, or Eric
Hughes, who revealed it was he who posted the proprietary
RC4 encryption sourcecode to sci.crypt. But until you can
count the years and do the Statute of Limitations
calculation: keep schtum, and keep coding.
http://wiki.haven.sh/index.php/WikiWikiWan
- mobilemesh in the real world
http://www.ntk.net/index.cgi?b=02001-04-06#TRACKING
- in accordance with hopeful prophecy
http://groups.google.com/groups?selm=3555ls%24fsv%40news.xs4all.nl
- cypherpunks post code
http://www.dnalounge.com/backstage/log/2002/02.html#21-feb-2002
- make every day asshole season!
Codecon's legal panel was a bit riling for the dirty
foreigners in the audience. The DMCA might be bad, they
reassured the audience, but some other countries' laws were
plain awful. "I heard the UK's law is very bad", said one
panelist, the unspoken "IANAL" hanging over his words. Well
- as one of the sources who publicised Britain's old-style
DMCA law - it's *bad*, as they say, but it's not *criminal*.
While the US feds can come and practically arrest you for
telling a friend how to change the region code on your DVD
player, a company still has to file a civil suit here in the
UK. Of course, such namby-pambiness won't last for long.
Article 8(3) of the EUCD (to be part of British law by the
end of this year) will ensure that ISPs share liability for
allegedly copyright-infringing material. So even if your ISP
knows it's dumb to block Napster, or that your satire site is
free speech, they won't be able to risk getting done over by
the intellectual property barons. Who needs the police when
the Internet is "self-policing"? Also, it's goodbye to "fair
use": while the EUCD says that countries can include
exemptions for current practice, rumour has it that the UK
won't bother with uncrippled media for the disabled, archive
preservation or personal backups. The EUCD is bad in theory,
and could be much worse in implementation. Drag yourself to
Cambridge tomorrow to discuss how to fix it.
http://uk.eurorights.org/miniconf/
- like Codecon, but in a Colony
http://www.ntk.net/index.cgi?b=02001-10-05&l=15#l
- remind us not to be so light on American jurisprudence again
http://www.cptech.org/ecom/jurisdiction/whatyoushouldknow.html
- also, the Hague Convention means *everyone* gets the globally worst laws
They say we're stuck in the past. But we like it there -
it's where the truth is. Or so it seems when one skims the
past as precisely fossilised by Alexa's Wayback Machine, and
compare it to the daily re-inventions of the live Web.
Compare and contrast, for instance, the current bio page of
of "Secretary of the US Army" Thomas E. White, stored at
http://www.army.mil/leaders/Secarmy/bio.htm , with the slightly
more Enron-oriented edition preserved forever at
http://web.archive.org/*/http://www.army.mil/leaders/Secarmy/bio.htm
Or with all those rumours about what really happened at Ars
Digita, why not read what Philip Greenspun had to say before:
http://web.archive.org/*/http://philip.greenspun.com/arsdigita/litigation-story
(see June 03, 2001) - and after the lawyers got to him:
http://philip.greenspun.com/arsdigita/litigation-story . Or
perhaps you just want to reassure yourself that you didn't
hallucinate that BBC URL you briefly spotted? For which, see
http://makeashorterlink.com/?V2B61327 . Who knows what evil
lurks in the hearts of men?
http://www.oreillynet.com/pub/a/webservices/2002/01/18/brewster.html
- Brewster Kahle knows!
>> ANTI-NEWS <<
berating the obvious
US media still baffled by notion of all-Scottish GB team:
http://www.ntk.net/2002/02/22/dohuk.png ... must have mislaid
ENCARTA: http://www.ntk.net/2002/02/22/dohjob.png ... arsonist
didn't like Nirvana's music, "held grunge against tourists":
http://news.independent.co.uk/world/australasia/story.jsp?story=134554
... MS avoid acronym for "Critical Update Notification Tool":
http://support.microsoft.com/directory/article.asp?ID=KB;EN-US;Q224420
... BILLIE lookalike promoting debt relief for young brides of
unemployed DJs?: http://www.ntk.net/2002/02/22/dohdebt.png ...
http://www.freedom.co.uk/ "no longer open to the public" ...
"Dull, uninspiring desktop?" MBUK knows just how you feel:
http://www.mbuk.co.uk/wallpaper_page.asp ... webdesigners of
the week: http://www.kittmaster.com/webdesign.htm versus
http://website.lineone.net/~initiative.cafe/ (creator of
http://website.lineone.net/~initiative.cafe/scrnw.html ?)...
backing the theory that anthrax attacks were "an inside job":
http://www.ntk.net/2002/02/22/dohwhite.png ... oh, buy one
anyway: http://consumerwholesale.zoovy.com/product/2 ... that
old DIY spirit: http://www.blackanddecker.co.uk/scripts/ ...
http://www-cgsc.army.mil/milrev/English/DecFeb99/bowdish.htm
(final para) warns of "the specter of Orson Welles' 'big
brother'"... LESLIE BUNDER slams Ali G's cheap attempts "to get
attention", in cheap attention-seeking PR stunt of his own:
http://www.jewish.co.uk/editorial14.php3 ... "What's mean the
Click-Thrus?", ponders http://www.valuesponsor.com/faq.html ...
>> EVENT QUEUE <<
goto's considered non-harmful
Squaxx dek Thargo posse in the house! Yes, The Galaxy's
Greatest Comic will be spinning the zarjaz and ghafflebette
sounds at 2000AD's 25th ANNIVERSARY PARTY (from 7pm, Thu,
2002-02-28, the Ministry of Sound, London SE1), along with
live band Pitchshifter, writer and artist signings, X-Boxes
and manga videos. Apparently some of the proceeds go to
Amnesty International somehow, marking something of a change
of heart for one-man "judge, jury and executioner" uberfascist
Judge Dredd.
http://www.2000adonline.com
- UKP15 (Earth Money), and speaking of gun-toting radicals...
http://www.ukuug.org/events/ESR_20020227.shtml
- ...Eric S Raymond speaks at London City Uni on Wed 27
http://www.silicon-beach.com/events.html
- annoying clash with "Silicon Business" forum in Brighton
And concluding this special Cambridge-themed month of events,
PROFESSOR JOHN CONWAY, game theorist and inventor of "Life",
will be spontaneously regenerating in the appropriately shaped
surroundings of this year's DARWIN COLLEGE LECTURES (from
5.30pm, Fri 2002-03-01, Lady Mitchell Hall, Sidgwick Avenue,
Cambridge, free). Special request: if he's taking questions,
could someone ask him if, as legend has it, he specifically
devised "Mornington Crescent" as an example of an activity
which defies traditional game theoretic analysis, and whether
he thinks this accounts for its popularity on Radio 4's panel
quiz "I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue"?
http://www.dar.cam.ac.uk/lectures/2002/JohnConway.html
- Huey "The Power Of Love" Lewis sadly not available
http://hensel.lifepatterns.net/
- no, not the MB board game: "Lawyer's salary please!"
>> TRACKING <<
sufficiently advanced technology : the gathering
SPAMASSASSIN sits between you and your inbox, picking over
your mail and weighting it against over two hundred spam
indicators, like multiple exclamation marks, the phrase
"Trace anyone by social security number", and "This is not
spam". Mails that trip one too many sensors get tagged with
an indicator in the subject line and a detailed
justification for their punishment in the body. They can be
automatically bounced back to source, sent off to /dev/null
or reported to the authorities. If Spamassasin's barrel of
ingenious regexp tests wasn't enough, the author, official
NTK hero Justin Mason, has assimilated wider checks (Vipul's
razor, various blackhole databases) into the program, and
uses a genetic algorithm to regularly re-weigh the settings
- leading to a really very impressive hit rate. Out of
around 130 messages (or 677KB) of spam a day, v1.0
spamassassin let through only a handful of bad boys, and
imprisoned less than one legitimate mail a day. And Version
2.0's new auto-whitelist means that now even your most
spam-akin friends need only stop SHOUTING!!! for one posting
to be permanently allowed past. There's a standalone
assassin daemon for ISPs, and a great deal of contributed
activity with the prog. In the long run, we guess it may
just make the spammers smarter, but, hell, we'd be happy
with even that small evolutionary step. If you haven't got
it, take a look. And if you have - how did we score?
http://spamassassin.taint.org/
- of course this will only breed super-smart resistant spammers
http://spamassassin.taint.org/tests.html
- and we're always suspect because of our LINE OF YELLING
>> MEMEPOOL <<
ceci n'est pas une http://www.gagpipe.com/
gotta recognise 'em all!: http://totl.net/VirusScanner/ ... a
joke, surely?: http://www.itcontractorsreunited.com vs fucked
employees reunited: http://www.globaldoublecrossing.com/ ...
bloody thumbnails: http://www.georgewgirls.com/ ... answering
the age-old question: who was Playmate Of The Month when you
were born?: http://lglandon.free.fr/pmpb/ ... paging Dr FREUD:
http://www.mcphee.com/bigindex/current/10884.html ... comedy
mods: http://www.afrotechmods.com/stupid/memory/memory.htm ...
still stained with the bitter tears of betrayed IBM idealism:
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=1068077127
... A cup of coffee? (because it's a good source of Brownian
motion?): http://uk.news.yahoo.com/020221/12/csplt.html ...
http://www.theonion.com/onion3806/infograph_3806.html imitates
http://www.satirewire.com/charts/chat.shtml ... "very special
[cover] version" places threatening-sounding GOD on the scene:
http://www.09112001.com/images/memorials/silentnight.htm ...
ENDEMOL making reality quiz show for C5, plan to call it "Need
To Know"... an enclave of bgcolor="#00FFFF" in a sea of black
and white: http://vwww.abo.fi/users/rpalmber/enclaves.htm ...
c'mon, somebody cough up that $8M for http://www.anywhere.com/
so they can afford to move out of "5 Cottons Gardens":
http://whois.geektools.com/cgi-bin/proxy.cgi?query=anywhere.com
... enough about me - "What colour are your eyes?", enquires
http://www.vsj.co.uk/subscriptions/ , flirtatiously...
>> GEEK MEDIA <<
get out less
TV>> it's all war, all the time, with GLADIATORS OF WORLD WAR
II: RAF FIGHTER COMMAND (8pm, Fri, C5) snapping at the heels
of Nazi celebrity recollection I MET ADOLF EICHMANN (9pm, Fri,
BBC2), the largely self-explanatory KAMIKAZE IN COLOUR (8pm,
Sun, C5), plus PANORAMA's (10.15pm, Sun, BBC1) topical look at
the Paras' peacekeeping role in Afghanistan, following their
expert handling of unarmed civilians in Northern Ireland...
low-budget horror goes head-to-head in a double bill of Abel
"Driller Killer" Ferrara's THE FUNERAL (11.35pm, Fri, BBC2)
and THE ADDICTION (1.10am, Fri, BBC2) up against John
Carpenter compilation BODY BAGS (1.25am, Fri, C4)... though
neither quite as upsetting as the self-injuring antics of MTV
import JACKASS (11.25pm, Fri, C4)... Brittany Murphy briefly
interrupts Mark Dacascos' incessant kickboxing in superhuman
road romp DRIVE (9pm, Sun, C5)... BBC starts stranding THE
SIMPSONS at 6pm every weekday in order to help build up a
fanbase for when they defect to C4 in 2004... choose Bill
Murray heist caper QUICK CHANGE (9pm, Mon, C5) over Welsh
"Trainspotting" knockoff TWIN TOWN (10pm, Mon, C4), though
it's a tough call against Johnny "On-Digital monkey" Vegas on
ROOM 101 (10pm, Mon, BBC2)... and Powerbook-compatible aliens
miss that vital CERT advisory on INDEPENDENCE DAY (9pm, Tue,
C5): http://www.storsand.net/humour/cert/ca199613.html ...
following the cult bootleg-scene success of "John's Not Mad"
http://www.cartelcommunique.co.uk/johnsnotmad.htm , further
source material is provided in Tourette's syndrome follow-up
docu THE BOY CAN'T HELP IT (9pm, Wed, BBC1) - a profanity-
packed "spoiler" for the start of the new series of ER (9pm,
Wed, C4)... and the ratings-grabbing continues on Thu, with
HORIZON (9pm, Thu, BBC2) illustrating the nature-vs-nurture
debate with bungled-circumcision "The Boy Who Was Turned Into
A Girl"... as TROUBLE AT THE TOP (9.50pm, Thu, BBC2) follows
its penetrating analysis of what went wrong with Bucks Fizz by
applying ISO 9000 standards to BBC soap flop "Eldorado"...
FILM>> the beauty of Russell Crowe's mathematics is somewhat
overshadowed by that of Jennifer Connelly's hair in staggered-
release part-spy-movie, part-cinematic-exploration-of-the
signal-detection-theory-model-of-schizophrenia, A BEAUTIFUL
MIND ( http://www.capalert.com/capreports/beautifulmind.htm :
delusional frenzy; rage against God; woman placing man's hand
on her chest; a man and woman in bed - clothed. Maybe the man
and woman in bed together were married in the movie but the
actor and actress were not) - loosely based on the paper
"Signal Detection Indices In Schizophrenia On A Visual,
Auditory, And Bimodal Continuous Performance Test" (L Mussgay
& R Hertwig, Schizophrenia Research 3, 1990)... Michael
Douglas and Famke Janssen struggle to extract a 6-digit number
- just 1,000,000 combinations! - from bonkers Brittany "Drive"
Murphy in surveillance psycho-thriller DON'T SAY A WORD
( http://www.screenit.com/movies/2001/don't_say_a_word.html:
[Murphy] runs her hand up inside her shirt, fondling her own
breast; we briefly see [Murphy's] panties)... while Cate
Blanchett plays an undercover Zeta Reticulan in boring "Saving
Private Ryan"-style romance CHARLOTTE GRAY (imdb: based-on-
novel; french-resistance; wwii; first-aid-nursing-yeomanry;
special-operations-executive; spy)...
RED BOOK AUDIO>> just a brief selection of random pop
soundalikes this month, with PAUL TAYLOR leading the pack for
not only identifying that the chorus of A1's "Caught In The
Middle" is "a blatant rip-off" of Natalie Imbruglia's "Torn",
but that you can replicate it yourself by feeding "Torn"
through the "Female-To-Male" EAX effect on Creative Labs
soundcards. Regarding Samantha Mumba's "Baby Been Thinking
Bout You Lately", and The Stone Roses' "Made Of Stone" ("When
the streets are cold and lonely/ And the cars they burn below
me") - "It's the same song innit!", argued ANONYMOUS TIPSTER,
though RONAN WAIDE ventured into yet more obscure territory by
alleging that Stillwater's "Fever Dog" (from the soundtrack to
"Almost Famous") "carries the same drumbeat" as U2's "Bullet
The Blue Sky" while "the guitar is only lacking the steel
slide bits at the end of each power chord"... "Perhaps Jesus
Jones are supporting me at SXSW?" piped up TOBY SLATER,
referring to an earlier version of the festival line-up
http://www.sxsw.com/music/0festival/bands/ linked to from NTK
2002-02-08. "Or maybe I'm supporting them?", Toby continues,
"Maybe we can get The Soup Dragons and Candy Flip along as
well". Or maybe it might help explain the preponderance of
American brands in your jaunty would-be anticapitalist anthem,
"Consumption", Toby: http://www.tobyslater.com/consumption/ -
no wonder you "keep on buying so much [you] don't need" if
you're buying it from Pacific Bell, whose core business is
providing local telecommuncations services for the West Coast
of the USA... and finally, following NTK 2002-02-08's Buffy-
inspired suggestion that the stammering Pop Idol guy should
"just sing everything he says", ALAN CONNOR sympathetically
weighed in with a list of cover versions he could do - Paul
Hardcastle's "19", for instance - if he wanted to pursue a
separate career as "MC Stammer", with further possibilities at:
http://www.mankato.msus.edu/dept/comdis/kuster/media/songs.html .
But it was left to LLOYD WOOD to sneer Simon Cowell-style at
the whole idea, pointing out that "stammering results from
paying too much attention to what you say [...] whereas
singing is overlearned, rehearsed, speech". Lloyd claims he's
"pretty sure New Scientist covered this recently" - presumably
as part of their "The Science Of Pop Idol" pullout special?...
>> SMALL PRINT <<
Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that
happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it
on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have
nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent.
Registered at the Post Office as
"basic text"
http://pythoncard.sourceforge.net/samples2.html
NEED TO KNOW
THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK.
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