Need To Know 2000-01-21

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"'We made the buttons on the screen look so good you'll want to lick them', says Steve." - STEVE JOBS on the jellybean-licious MacOS X http://www.pathfinder.com/fortune/2000/01/24/app.html ...watch out for the brown "Application Quit" dialogs >> HARD NEWS << crusoe carusos TRANSMETA announced its new range of chips this week (spoiling our prediction that they were unveiling a new set of amusing meta-tags for their Website: names count for nothing in this business). The low-power chips for mobiles, in case you don't get in much, are called Crusoes (which, of course, connates lack of mobility and powerlessness. qv previous parens). Fuddled hacks have so far been vague on the ramifications - extra marks for Wired News on their trenchant analysis of the menu served to journos at the launch - so we'll leave it to Ars Technica to give you the real run-down. Best observation so far goes to NTK sub Nick Sweeney who noted that the webcast Torvalds vs Dave Taylor Quake deathmatch gave a powerful message out to the Linux weenies: "he may be a god to you, but to us, he's another chubby engineer who needs to practice his plasma gun skills." http://arstechnica.com/cpu/1q00/crusoe/crusoe-1.html - for the hungry for knowledge http://www.wired.com/news/technology/0,1282,33778,00.html - for the hungry Our obsession with JONATHAN UNGOED-THOMAS's coverage of the thyber-crime scene continues unabated, even if his latest work: "Hacker gang blackmails firms with stolen files", actually contains a germ of truth in it. VISA UK genuinely did receive a ransom demand, and the James Grant arrest is connected. But what about those eleven other companies? Would one hacker "gang" really try to draw that much attention to itself? And what of those "source codes", and the fiendish tricks of "sophisticated" cyberterrorists who use the dreaded tools of the scoundrel, "Internet mail and chat"? And would the appearence of this story - with its implication of an organised hacker fronthave *anything* to do with the announcement of a "cybercrime" squad by the NCIS, just days later? http://www.the-times.co.uk/news/pages/Sunday-Times/stinwenws01028.html?999 - and he's a hit on talk.guns too! http://www.the-times.co.uk/interface/ - feast on those "Spirit of '94" button GIFs! http://www.homeoffice.gov.uk/oicd/conslist2.htm - then tap into the Home Office's IOCA consultation exercise An *exceptionally* mild winter is probably high up on the forthcoming excuses made by TELEHOUSE about their increasingly crowded server piles. Still, if it's still too chilly for you outside, maybe you'd like to pop by to the all-too-popular co-location house, where temperatures in some cages have hit up to 37 degrees centigrade recently. While Telehouse ops staff say that there isn't a problem, the fact that they're now leaving doors open (to let the hot air escape, and to fit a standalone heat-exchanger in) should make it a lot easier to sneak in and toast yourself in front of nice blazing, mission-critical Webserver. http://www.telehouse.net/ - companies mentioned http://www.linx.net/ - ...in this article >> ANTI-NEWS << berating the obvious more Y2K hubris: http://members.aol.com/jesprognyc/y2000.htm ... you'd at least LUCENT would know better than to run IIS: http://www.ntk.net/2000/01/21/lucentuk.gif ... New Media Age Online gives full cc: list to e-mail subscribers, prompting imminent net marketing spam meltdown ... "does 50% of the virgin.com staff resigning in a week count as a Falco?": not yet, but you're getting there ... KEVIN WARWICK watch: "it could be one day possible to hack into someone's brain and corrupt what they're sensing." - NEW SCIENTIST, 2000-01-22 ... THE GUARDIAN, as part of its weeklong festival of anti-news, claims "Public enemy were the first to download a whole album" ... ONION STORIES in the real world: http://www.ntk.net/2000/01/21/redirsfgateonion.html vs http://biz.yahoo.com/prnews/000120/ny_agency__1.html ... SEGA DREAMCAST features "individual floating shaving heads, with 90 omni-directional slots to catch and cut all hairs": http://195.224.53.206/comet/default.asp?page=PP&product=358851&site=GNG >> EVENT QUEUE << goto's considered non-harmful Another couple of years go by [see NTK 1998-01-30], another Namco TIME CRISIS sequel lures you to the AMUSEMENT TRADE EXHIBITION INTERNATIONAL (Tue-Thu 2000-01-25/27, Earls Court, London). We must admit, we're not too sure about this one (the Namco Time Crisis sequel, that is - ATEI's the same every year): CRISIS ZONE has the same "press pedal to duck" action, but the recoiling plastic pistol has been replaced with a H&K MP5K-style submachine gun, which destroys both the on-screen terrain and much of the subtlety and pacing of the original. http://www.atei.co.uk/ - we *still* like the idea of a "Parks And Attractions" show And for those who prefer their huntin' and shootin' rather more "off the rails", London games cybercaff THE PLAYING FIELDS proclaims that it's the "only" UK qualifying centre for this year's CPL $100,000 Quake 3 playoffs. The heats don't actually start till Sun 2000-02-20 but, because the UK winner gets UKP1000, free entry to the Dallas finals, free flights, free accommodation, UKP500 in spending money and "Gameplay freebies" (presumably a baseball cap with the old Wireplay logo on it), competition is likely to be *fierce*. http://www.playingfields.co.uk/content/cpl_about.shtml - "Players may dress in jeans, shorts, slacks, skirts, shoes, T-shirts or dress shirts. Hats can be worn." >> TRACKING << sufficiently advanced technology: the gathering The browser wars may be over in the land of the Big People, but down here in the ASCII trenches, there's still everything to play for. Our new favourite (we're so fickle): LINKS. As Kragen Sitaker notes, you can't search for it, and you can't tell anyone about it without them thinking you've just found out about Lynx, but apart from the name, it's great. On-the-fly reformatting of a downloading page, handles tables well, and the same cute xterm mouse handling that made our previous love, w3m, such a joy. And at only 300K for the source, how could you not give it a go? http://artax.karlin.mff.cuni.cz/~mikulas/links - at least somebody in .cz isn't running a warez site http://mordor.net/~bet/links/ - mirror where the shadows lie >> MEMEPOOL << hasta la altavista IRC IRL ROFL: http://www.ircnews.com/mirc.html ... ... whois -h whois.nic.uk linuxformat.co.uk ... how the other 0.0001% live: http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/mfjet.htm#fjetcus ... teletubby Happy Meals! ... Pseuds Corner meets Death Metal: http://www.evilmusic.com/bands/entombed.html ... using major net outages to get bargains on auction sites ... Web design of the future: http://www.toyangel.com/iluvjarjar/ ... http://www.its-a-london-thing.com/ vs http://its-a-london-thing.nu/ [caution: content advisory] ... http://www.unamerican.com staffer, ironically, appears to "hate his job": http://www.ntk.net/2000/01/21/redirunamerican.html ... obligatory Star Wars/Lego/Occasional Funny Shuttlecocks link: http://www.brunching.com/ratings/rate-starwarslegos.html ... >> GEEK MEDIA << get out less TV>> an unofficial cannibalism theme on BBC2 tonight, with mildly disappointing new LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN (10pm) - hint: the butcher's surname, Briss, is close to the Jewish word for circumcision - plus DELICATESSEN (12.50am, Fri), post- apocalyptic French food farce from the makers of Alien 4... TV's finest music format returns in TOP TENS (9pm, Sat, C4), this week on "one hit wonders" - presumably including host Phill Jupitus, who had a minor success with that Buzzcocks quiz game a few years back... but the future belongs to C5 and its annual SCI-FIVE WEEKEND, featuring Rutger Hauer parallel universer CROSSWORLDS (9pm, Sat), bleak Crichton neurosurgery parable THE TERMINAL MAN (10.50pm, Sat), dated '80s Smith & Jones clunker MORONS FROM OUTER SPACE (12.50am, Sat), and - intentionally funnier? - Zsa Zsa Gabor all-female oldie QUEEN OF OUTER SPACE (2.25am, Sat)... then on Sunday, there's no doubt "edited for language" peerless geek blockbuster GHOSTBUSTERS (5.35pm, Sun), plus incomprehensibly odd Marlon Brando remake of ISLAND OF DR MOREAU (9pm, Sun) which, to be fair, has a great title sequence... in the face of which, C4 throws up its hands in despair and schedules shockingly unerotic Demi Moore / Burt Reynolds "comedy" STRIPTEASE (10pm, Sun, C4)... nothing on the rest of the week, unless you count double-episode body-swap X FILES (10.20pm, Wed, BBC1), C4 devoting an hour-plus to a history of the clitoris - first in a 3-part series on PRIVATE PARTS (10pm, Thu, C4), and Richard Metzger trying to get some sense out of uber '70s-casualty and Illuminatus! creator, Robert Anton Wilson, in DISINFO NATION (12.40am, Thu, C4)... FILM>> with Gabriel Byrne in the opposite of his usual role, STIGMATA (http://www.capalert.com/capreports/ : severe distortion of reality; constant sinister flavor; tattoos of nudity; placement of Jesus in a setting of sinister darkness; mumbo-jumbo about God's sovereignty; a full meal of violence to the non-believer) is to "The Exorcist" what "End Of Days" is to "The Omen", though sadly not as good as any of them. The plot explores the ancient prophecy that, when Christ returns to earth, he will take the form of one of the Arquette siblings and, since you ask, doesn't appear to be based around the Ministry song of the same name... Chris Columbus reteams with Robin Williams to give the world the appropriately interminable Mrs Robot Doubtfire weepie BICENTENNIAL MAN (http://www.capalert.com/capreports/ : teen and preteen arrogance against fair parental authority; assisted suicide; flatulence; detailed discussion of sexual intercourse and orgasm; a romp into the world of Kevorkianism and Clintonics) - enough to make Asimov fans modify the First Law: "injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm - unless it's fricking *Robin Williams*"... otherwise you take your chances with sci-fi-free Aussie ensemble STRANGE PLANET (imdb: comedy / romance), curiously unreviewed Brit crime caper RANCID ALUMINIUM (imdb comment: "the most convincing performance came from Dani Behr of all people"), or arguably Wes "Nightmare On Elm St" Craven's most terrifying creation yet - Meryl Streep in violin-teaching feelgooder MUSIC OF THE HEART (http://www.capalert.com/capreports/ : marital breakdown horrors; violent attitude; inviting cohabitation; overall cheapening of marriage; drive-by murder [unseen])... COMPO CORNER>> yes, perhaps we should have specified that you didn't have to enter *all* the rounds in our soul-destroyingly epic end-of-year quiz [NTK 1899-12-31 ho ho]; we regret to report that none of the remixes of the phrases "Need To Know" from the extensive list of pop tunes provided has yet been deemed adequate for use as a "theme tune" for NTK personnel at their (irregular) public appearances. Still, commendations to both BEN at cam.ac.uk for his "Windowsian Crapsody" - "Mozilla! We will not let you code (Let him code!)" etc - and ELLIOTT NOEL for "Baby Got Stack" (to the tune of "Baby Got Back", by Sir Mix-a-lot, obviously). Sadly, both were disqualified for not submitting MIDI accompaniments as per the contest rules; Elliott's claim that "he actually began a IT module of it a while ago" but doesn't "really have the tracking skills anymore" is good - *but not good enough*. So, at last, we are pleased to announce that the overall winner of our Y19100 no-prize is none other than BEN LAURIE who, safe in his server-bunker http://www.thebunker.net/hosting.htm , cheerfully corrected even our official competition answers (specifically "Q. What status response should be sent back by a HTTP/1.1 server to a HTTP/0.9 GET request? A. Trick question! The HTTP/0.9 protocol doesn't support a status response") with "Tch. HTTP/0.9 is recognisable by the fact it doesn't send a version number (incidentally, the flag that indicates this in Apache is called 'assbackwards'. Honest)". Well done Ben, and comiserations to the rest of you: next year, we promise not to make the quiz so difficult that the only only right answers come from co-authors of Apache... >> SMALL PRINT << Need to Know is a useful and interesting UK digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week. You can read it on Friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do. It is compiled by NTK from stuff they get sent. Registered at the Post Office as "somewhat skeptical" http://www.deja.com/=dnc/getdoc.xp?AN=572872131 NEED TO KNOW THEY STOLE OUR REVOLUTION. NOW WE'RE STEALING IT BACK. Archive - http://www.ntk.net/ Unsubscribe? Mail ntknow-unsubscribe@lists.ntk.net Subscribe? Mail ntknow-subscribe@lists.ntk.net NTK now is supported by UNFORTU.NET, and by you: http://www.ntk.net/books (K) 2000 Special Projects. Copying is fine, but include URL: http://www.ntk.net/ Tips, news and gossip to tips@spesh.com - remember your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material. Remember: Sending >500KB attachments is forbidden by the Geneva Convention. Your country may be at risk if you fail to comply.